I recently received a text from a friend that explained why she hadn't returned my phone call...she'd had a pretty dramatic run of bad luck. It was a pretty emotional text and my reaction was heartfelt--so much so that simply responding by text didn't seem enough...no, no. This woman needed a phone call, no..no..cookies! She needed cookies...after thinking about it a minute it seemed like dinner AND cookies would be even better. Something delicious and brilliant, delivered in a super cute basket too..yep, that would be the best way to respond. Along with a beautifully written, well thought out card. And some flowers.
In short, she got no response from me-no text, no call, no meal..no nothing. Having myself been the beneficiary of many acts of kindness, I have wondered how and why this happens to me. It happens in many different forms...constantly. This cunning form of procrastination has infiltrated my life and my personality. It tricks me because as I add more and more scaffolding to the idea--it gives me the illusion that I'm accomplishing something...when in reality I'm just setting myself up for less and less opportunities to accomplish anything. The cycle seems to occur as follows: I am presented with a need or call to action, I respond by way over complicating it or assuming this task will be 100 times easier to accomplish at another time... And then..big fat nothing. You could even argue I entertain this exact cycle with this blog! I remember I need to do it but decide that tomorrow I will be much more creative. When in reality these finished products that I either desire to do or at least complete don't fall like manna from heaven--and the ideas don't get substantially better by procrastinating--they simply just need to be done.
Netflix will always be there tomorrow, and will be much more enjoyable without the wet blanket of self-loathing.
I'm a little tired tonight. I love you guys.
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