Friday, May 30, 2014

I am avoiding having my picture taken

Katie, I am amazed at your beautiful pictures. You are so good at this. I remember getting some film developed (weird) out of my camera and when I got the pictures back they were about half pictures of Katie taking selfies with an extreme closeup fish-eye of her nasal passages. I remember I showed mom and she said, "Oh, she did it again"-like you had kamikaze-ed multiple rolls of film this way.

yer a goof.

I am challenging myself to not be feared of the camera this summer. I am terrible at both taking pictures and at having my picture taken. BUT I want to be better.

I guess the first problem is that I am never prepared. I never have my camera ready, and I feel like I have no proof of vast section of my kids lives. But even when I do take pictures they never really turn out that cute.

Someone said to me recently that people who don't like pictures taken of themselves think that they are a lot prettier than they actually are. Well, that was sort of rude and I put that person's name in my black book, but it is not like I think I am a stunner in my head.  (I guess I think it would be nice if I was). I sort of do feel horrified when I see pictures of myself. 

Here is the thing.  I am never in pictures. In our families' photo history, I barely exist. That doesn't seem right.

I am currently high on dayquil

You should make this recipe and eat it. I am not sure if I should make it all the time every day, or never make it again because it is all I want to eat. It is Hawaiian Butter mochi. The only funky thing you need is rice flour. The recipe says Mochiko- but that is hard to find. Plain old Rice flour should be at most grocery stores. It might be in the healthy food section.

Butter Mochi

Butter Mochi
2 cups milk
1 can coconut milk
1 stick unsalted butter, melted
5 large eggs
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 cups (16 oz or one box) mochiko flour
2 tsp baking powder
1. Preheat oven at 350 degrees.
2. Whisk together milk, coconut milk, melted butter, eggs, and vanilla extract in a large bowl.  In a separate bowl, sift together sugar, mochiko flour, and baking powder.
3. Gently mix together wet and dry ingredients until fully incorporated.  There may be a few lumps, but if mixed for a few more seconds should dissolve on their own.
4. Pour into a lightly greased 9×12 baking dish.
5. Bake for 1 hour at 350 degrees, until brown at the edges and golden brown on top. Sometimes it needs extra time, especially if you like the edges to be particularly crispy. The batter will also rise significantly, but will settle after cooling.

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

I'm Boring

So I guess I am pretty much the most boring person in the world. At first I thought that this will be great because I had so many ideas. Yet here I am days later with a big fat nothin'. I feel like I talk about the same things over and over. Now the thought of writing about it makes me want to go to sleep. Yep that's me, boring. The only dream I have had lately is that I forgot to register Macy for kindergarten. I was panicked and I had to fly in a hot air balloon to get anywhere and well it was really windy and there was a lot of sitting in hot air balloon traffic. Long story short I felt like I kept having panic attacks. I did not get to the school in time but we did fly over Jurassic Park. Surprising twist right? Well I just threw that in there, it didn't really happen. I didn't make it to her school before the deadline... the end. See, even my dreams are boring.

Is it possible to go through a "third-life crisis"? Instead of a "mid-life crisis"? If so I think I may have hit it. I am 31 years old. A mom of two littles. They are crazy. I love it. I feel like I am putting a lot of pressure on myself to do something I haven't done before. Experience something new and get out of my comfort zone. But for a good reason. Not like going to a party with a bunch of people you don't know and they decide to play curses and you have to act out turning into a werewolf in front of everyone. I think about it and want to melt and puke at the same time. What a whirl. You know that kind of thing? Maybe not.

I have started doing photography and people are paying me for it. I have a wedding in a couple weeks and some other shoots planned. I'm happy with it. I am trying something. I enjoy it. It gets me out of the house and focused on something else. I feel productive and i think it makes other people happy. I take pretty pictures then I edit them if needed and people see themselves in a different way than maybe they did before. However, I am a little nervous but mostly excited.

So that is the extent of my boringness for now. Until next time...

Monday, May 26, 2014

I don't get dressed anymore

As long as we are being random, I have a new manifesto: I don't get dressed anymore. Which is not to say that I don't wear clothes...I just don't wear "outfits"..or make any serious attempts to be fashionable on a daily basis. Leggings, sneakers, and a loose top that covers the derrier = that's the outfit. Leggings have changed my life and, perhaps more importantly, my attitude. It makes me more willing to do a housework, tackle projects, and go up the stairs a little faster. It also makes me more excited for times that I do get dressed, like for a date night or something. I don't get so sick of my clothes or feel the need to buy as much. And if people see me out and about I feel less pressure about what I'm wearing because they probably assume I just came from working out--and sometimes (but not always) they are correct. I am generally a happier person being more comfortable, more willing to move and expend less mental energy on looking a certain way.

I also am obsessed with my new armband iphone case and microphone headphones that let me bring my music with me throughout the house..or talk on the phone hands-free while I fold laundry. It seriously makes me so happy.

Also, I really want these leggings:

Friday, May 23, 2014


Ok, so I will go first then....

Last night I had my flying dream again.  It had been a pretty long time since my last one, I don't know how long, but a long time.  I love flying in my dreams. My whole body is into it. I am flapping my arms, but with purpose. Each up and down of my arms really moves me foward. To break I have to bend my legs.  I feel happy, but not happy like a sunbeam, like a proud happy, like I am really doing what my body is capable of.

I think I might be allergic to wheat. That isn't part of my dream, that is real. I am on day 5 of no wheat.  Downside: I can't eat homemade bread and butter. Upside: no tummy aches, some of my rashes are getting better, I have lost 2 lbs, and I eat other things besides homemade bread and butter, but mostly I feel about a million times better. More on this exciting topic later.

I want that dress.

love you sistas.
Heidi, you are up to bat.