Tuesday, June 3, 2014


“Well, I get dizzy spells, nausea, cold sweats, hot sweats, fever blisters, difficulty breathing, difficulty swallowing, blurred vision, involuntary trembling, dead hands, numb lips, fingernail sensitivity, pelvic discomfort.” Ok I may or may not be as crazy as Bob. We alls gots some crazy in us! So why not get a shrink and vent my guts out? I mean I can’t guarantee that any other shrink will look as good as Dr. Leo Marvin does in a tight white pair of short shorts, but there are other redeeming things about going to a counseling session besides checking out some guys white hairy thighs. Did I just say that? 

I have been going to couseling with Troy’s family once a week for about a month. I know when I say “counseling” people probably think that we have a horrible relationship or something. We have had some misunderstandings at times. We have felt awkward bringing up issues here and there. Although our issues as a family are minor, individually we all have had experiences that have made us the way we are. Getting to understand the people in my family has been incredible. At the end of the day we all love each other, a lot.

I think of troy’s family as much like my own as possible. I am so glad that we all want to make these relationships healthier and more flexible. I mean we are going to be in each other’s lives for the rest of our lives. Why not jump in and make it the best possible? Obviously it can be a little scary to lay your feelings out in front of others but I do a little at a time. That’s not to say that everyone should do a group session. I have done it both ways. Either way it’s made a huge change. I am so much more self aware. I can definitely see some positive changes in Troy’s family. As I see it, not going to counseling isn’t really an option for us. I owe this to Troy. I owe it to myself. I owe it to my kids and I owe it to Troy’s family. I want my kids to have nurtured and healthy relationships with both sides of the family. Regardless of how much I like one person or how convenient or awkward things can be at times. I refuse to let “being in control” control my life.  I don’t want to pass on my hang-ups to my kids. I fell in love with Troy. He is a product of his family as much as I am a product of mine. We love each other and we should love each other’s families.

Sorry about the boring rant.